A Necessary Evil
by alynwa
Summary: Originally written for the Short Affairs Challenge on LJ. The prompt word is "owl" and the prompt color is dark blue.


"I hate surveillance work," Napoleon said.

"I know," Illya replied. "I know because that is the fifth time you have said it. If you say it again, I will begin to hate _you._ "

Napoleon opened his mouth to answer, but decided against it when he saw the scowl on the Russian's face. Instead, he reached for his communicator. "Open Channel S2. Mark? How are you and April making out?"

"We saw a couple of bad birdies enter the backdoor about two hours ago, but the only thing that's 'appened since then is the lights being turned on when the sun went down." Napoleon heard a chuckle come through the device. "April said to tell you that we took turns watching the sky go from pink to light blue to dark blue to black and it was lovely."

"It's nice to know you two are making lemonade out of this lemon of an assignment. I take it neither bird you saw was Simmons?"

"That's correct…"

"Someone is coming!" Illya said as he pointed to a car's headlights that had just appeared around a curve in the road.

"Mark," Napoleon said, now all business. "A car is approaching! If this is our guy, things are going to get interesting. I want to speak to April."

"Yes, Sir?" April was always formal and professional when out in the field with her CEA.

"Hopefully, whoever is in the car with Simmons will go inside with him. You need to get down there and plant that tracer as fast as you can."

"Don't worry, Napoleon; it's a piece of cake."

"From your mouth, April, I hope things work out." Napoleon nodded at the nudge he felt from Illya. "Luck is on our side, April. Simmons got out of the driver's seat and it doesn't look like anyone else is in the car."

"Good. I'm moving down to the edge of the tree line. If the coast looks clear, I'll go plant the tracking device in one of the wheel wells. I'm handing Mark his communicator back along with mine. Talk to you later."

"Good luck, Luv." Mark watched as his partner swiftly get into position. He looked to his left where Napoleon and Illya were stationed approximately seventy – five yards away. All four agents were wearing black turtlenecks, caps, and grease paint. He could see they were also watching April's progress.

She waited at the edge of the woods for a few moments to see if anyone came out of the house or looked out a window. Seeing no one, she ran in a crouched position to the rear of Simmons' car. When that drew no attention, she scooted around to the driver's side rear wheel and quickly reached underneath to affix the small device to the car's body. She pulled the radio that tracked the transmitter out of her pocket and confirmed that the device was working. Satisfied that it was, she replaced it and prepared to return to her partner.

Just then, she heard a door open and voices coming out of the house. She ducked away from the voices and flattened against the rear of the car. _I hope Napoleon and Illya's plan works!_

An owl hooted loudly, the sound coming from somewhere to the left of the CEA and his partner. It caught the attention of whoever had exited the house and April could see by the position of their feet that they had turned in the direction of the sound. More owls began to hoot until it began to sound like an owl convention with everyone hooting at once.

A THRUSH, April couldn't tell which one, said, "Something must have spooked them, we better go check it out!" She could see from underneath the car five sets of legs jog off in the direction of the bird calls. _That would be the two we saw, Simmons plus the two in the house. That should be everyone!_ She raced back to her partner's position and the two hustled silently back to their car and drove to the rendezvous point.

Forty – five minutes later, the four agents were in a small diner in Palmyra, a town about half an hour outside Rochester, New York. The caps and grease paint had been removed and replaced with camouflage caps and orange hunting vests to blend in with the hunters in the area.

Napoleon raised his coffee cup in April's direction. "I'm so proud of you, April. You were superb! You made planting that device look easy!"

"Napoleon, I couldn't have done it without your brilliant idea to place recordings of birdcalls in the trees to distract the THRUSHies from walking to the car and finding me there!"

Illya rolled his eyes and said to Mark, "I think you and I should just leave so these two can continue their mutual admiration society."

"I think you're right, Mate."

April patted her partner's back. "Don't be that way, Mark, you and Illya were essential to our mission! Now, Simmons will be tracked back to the satrapy where he has his lab and UNCLE will destroy it."

The Russian raised his cup and said, "Let us hope that our contribution to this mission is concluded and the junior agents will be successful."

"'Ere, 'ere," Mark chimed in, "I'm ready for downtime."

"From your mouth," Napoleon said. "From your mouth."


End file.
